I have developed multiple personalities.
I can't lie about that.
I can lie about that if I want to.
That's a lie.
What happened to my sandy-footed hope?
Maybe I should take a test. Maybe the test will be negative. If the test is negative, I'll be even crazier from now until Monday.
But maybe I should take a test. Maybe the test will be positive. If the test is positive, I'll be happy and glowing from now until Monday.
If it rains tonight, does that mean I'm pregnant?
Has the world shifted off its axis? Does our globe now rotate around me and my maybe-baby?
Damn my acupuncturist for taking a vacation. I'm an addict and I need a fix. I wonder if safety pins would do the trick...
Maybe I should pee on a stick.
I won't pee on a stick.