There's a quote in the movie 28 Days (the one where Sandra Bullock goes to rehab) that says something like, "get a plant. If it's still alive in a year, get a pet. If it's not dead in a year, you can start a relationship. And if you don't kill that, you can think about having kids." I saw the movie a long time ago and I think at this point I've totally butchered the quote. And since this post is totally based on that quote, I thought I should try to portray it accurately. I went online and searched a thousand different ways. No luck. Finally, I tried "28 days I killed the plant" No luck. I did, however, find many results on how to keep marijuana plants alive.
This quote has been in my mind lately because I seem to have taken a hacksaw to that advice. Now granted, the quote is aimed at Sandra Bullock as a recovering addict and how she should approach commitment and responsibility in the outside world. But still. It's kinda good advice. So while my worst addiction is my current sugar habit, it seems like a sound plan to follow.
And through the natural course of life, follow I did. Over the years I accumulated and nurtured numerous plants. All thriving, I took on various pets and eventually my loving husband. And now babies.
It seems, however, that something funny happened once these little babies arrived. I seem to have lost the ability to maintain all that came before.
First I gave up watering my plants. Because seriously, philodendron, have a little patience. I've got babies here.
Next I killed my composting worms. Combination overfeeding, followed by underfeeding, followed by three days in the rain and probable flooding inside my Can O' Worms. It was an accidental negligence, and I feel very badly. As an oh-so-helpful family member recently pointed out, the worms were my responsibility, it was my choice to take them in, and my lack of care led to their untimely deaths. I get it. Thanks.
My lovable puppy is still alive. Probably because it is husband's job to provide food and water. He multi tasks better these days. But she is depressed, and wondering when mommy will be fun again.
Husband is okay. Patient, yes. Tired, yes. But okay, yes.
I don't want my puppy to feel lonely. I don't want dead worms and plants.
It's just that they're babies. My babies. For just this once. I have no choice but to make choices. The babies are flourishing.
I am stretched thin.
Motherhood? I'm catching on.